Seeing what is in front of us.
I love to watch the gazes of babies. They seem to stare off into space and take great delight in whatever they are seeing that I cannot. They giggle at the curtains and their eyes light up at the grass as if they are having the most fascinating conversations with angels or great-grandparents already passed. Smiling at the sky, laughing at the trees, waving at the wall, delighting in invisible company with their parents unaware.
I have envied the babies and their secret world. What are they seeing? What magical, mystical, delightful world are they a part of that I am not? I wanted in on the joke. On the secret. I wished for my eyes to sparkle and to share a laugh with an otherworldly companion.
I lay on my back in the grass for savasana after a two-hour yoga practice in the park. The summer breeze rustled the leaves on the sprawling branches of the tall trees as I gazed at clouds sailing above. I have cloud-gazed often, enjoying how they morph from one shape into another. I have photographed storm clouds and sunsets; wispy, feather-like clouds; and enormous, dense, sun-illumined clouds.
As I lay observing the sea of wave-like clouds floating quickly by, I was taken by the thought that this is what babies delight in. Perhaps they aren’t seeking the company of familiar angels or ancestors but rather they are joyful in their reunion with all things earth. Taken with the blue of the sky and the mystical movements of clouds. Ebullient with the music of the songbirds. Happy to rediscover the magical sensation of water as they splash and play together. Giggling at a joke carried on the breeze. Intrigued by the colours and rich textures surrounding them and ecstatic in the fullness of the sensory experience of life.
For a brief moment I knew that which I had envied. I delighted in all that surrounded me. Fulfilled by my place as participant and observer within this vibrant world. And I was grateful for the insight that there is nothing to seek that isn’t already right in front of me, and that it is from within me that I recognize and enjoy this magic all around.
Babies already understand this gift of life. Or perhaps it’s just gas. I’ll never know, but I’ll continue to muse.
Stephanie Hrehirchuk specializes in women’s health. The owner of atONE Holistic Living and a regular contributor at Gaia and Sivana Spirit, Stephanie offers programs and articles to assist women in restoring balance naturally.